Getting your period just got awesome.
Well, awesome-er. You may not think getting your period each month is anything to get jazzed about, but when you think about it, menstruation is pretty kick ass.
Here’s where you’re all, “Um yes, it makes me want to kick your ass for saying that, and throwing this iPad across the room.” But stay(free) with me here. There are reasons why having your period is bloody wonderful:
- It means you’re a woman, and being a woman totally rocks.
- It means you’re connected to the Earth, the lunar cycle, and the miracle that is Life. (Shut up, it so does.)
- You have some Divine Female Energy that’s part of you and all your sisters here on Planet Earth and it connects you to all of them. We may not all speak the same language, agree on politics or who’s the cutest boy in One Direction, but all of us women on the planet can all agree that cramps are not fun.
- It means you’re not (And 9 out of 20 times, yay!)
- It’s a handy way to help keep track of and organize your time. (As in, “Wow, has it been a month already? I need to get moving on that proposal!”)
- It means you’re healthy and your female body is working the way it should.
And like I said, getting your period is a whole lot better now than it used to be, and that’s worth celebrating. You know why they used to call it going “on the rag”? Because that what women used to use down there, rags. In fact, it wasn’t until World War I when they discovered that nurses were absconding with the rolled wood pulp (“Cellucotton”) bandages to use for their “monthly visitors” that someone finally got the bright idea to make and market feminine hygiene products to deal with menstruation. Sheesh, talk about a patriarchy – can you even believe it’s been less than 100 years that commercial sanitary napkins were widely sold?
(Of course women did use something before pads were around; Hypatia, who lived in the 4th century AD, was said to have thrown one of her used menstrual rags at an admirer in an attempt to discourage him. And by the way, that’ll still work today.)
The first pads were pricey, and when women could afford them, both they and the clerks behind the counter were too embarrassed by the whole thing. (Women were allowed to place money in a box so that they would not have to speak to the clerk when they took the product from the counter.) It took several years before disposable menstrual pads became commonplace, and even today they’re almost exclusively used just in the industrialized world.
But women have come a long way, baby, and so have our periods. Now the crimson tide has turned, thanks to websites and services like Helloflo. At Helloflo.com you can get lots of great advice about your period, your lady parts, and more. All those questions you have but don’t know where to ask them – now you can!
Now, you can also skip the desperate last-minute visits to the drugstore, the rummaging through your mom’s bathroom cabinet, the pilfering your roommate’s purse, and any shy downward glances at the cash register. Because Helloflo offers awesome monthly subscription plans where they send the period products you want right to your door—PLUS extras your menstrual self can really use, like cute candies and delicious chocolates. Helloflo, hello hashtag GENIUS! You actually get to create monthly packages tailored to your own personal flow, in every sense of the word. Or instead of a monthly subscription you can get a one-of-a-kind care package.
They also have lots of other cool stuff too, like period starter kits (if you’re wondering what to get your little sister for Christmas) and t-shirts that say “Uteruses before Duderuses” (if you’re wondering what to get ME for Christmas).
Oh Helloflo, where were you when I first needed you?! Well, at least they’re here for us now, to educate, inspire and entertain us—and insure no one ever again has to go through what I went through that fateful day in 8th grade. (Let’s just say white pants, my crush, history class—it wasn’t pretty.)
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