I used to say that I lived at the airport hotel in Heathrow airport in London.
That’s how it felt. I was always on a plane, with my carry on, passport in hand. But for the last four years I’ve been very settled in New York, where I’ve been acting and singing, and producing. I find myself singing down the streets (let’s say volume is not an issue!). I feel I can truly be my quirky loud self in this large city full of fellow quirksters.
New York is very special to me, a city that is alive, and I am surrounded by beautiful friends and the power of art!
I felt guilty in not knowing where I was most at home.
Where was my heart?
But my family are all back in the UK, as well as close friends who I have known and grown up with since I was little. This summer I have been back to the Isle of Wight, and it has been so lovely to catch up, share mad stories, laugh until your cheeks hurtm and just be a goofball around the village I grew up in.
Recently, I recorded a cover of “Come Home” by One Republic. And this song particularly resonated with me this month. This idea of home is where the heart is.
A while ago I was asked “Where is your heart, is it here or in New York?”
And I felt like I had to choose either New York or the UK, and I couldn’t.
I felt guilty in not knowing where I was most at home. Where was my heart?
But only recently have I realized after singing this song “Come Home,” I have learnt that I can feel at home in both places and that’s okay.
Home is where the people you love the most are and in my case I am lucky enough to be surrounded by this in more than one place.
And when I was singing this song in the recording studio, I found myself singing this for past loved ones, love interests, family and friends, and really singing out and showing that I will always fight to be with the people I care about, and I will come home.
I have these moments of just standing, breathing and letting my emotions get the best of me and I sing for the people I love.
Home is where the people you love the most are.
If you feel like an inbetweener, know you’re not alone.
I’ll leave you with some of the lyrics by One Republic. If you haven’t ever heard the original, I encourage you take a listen.
‘Cause I’ve been waiting for you
For so long
For so long
And right now there’s a war between the vanities
But all I see is you and me
The fight for you is all I’ve ever known
So come home.
I get lost in the beauty
Of everything I see
The world ain’t as half as bad
As they paint it to be
If all the sons
If all the daughters
Stopped to take it in
Well hopefully the hate subsides and the love can begin.
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