There is power in the tongue. The words you unleash into the universe have the ability to build or destroy. We assume others are conscious of our ideas and emotions, without properly expressing a solid point of view. Things often get lost in translation. Clarity is your best friend. Say what you mean and mean what you say. As women, we’ve been conditioned to show more and speak less or on the flip side, be as loud as possible to send a message. Our voices matter and have the strength to spark change. Every single word and syllable matters.
Positive affirmations for women are glorious and we need more of them. It all starts with the message you spread within. How you feel about yourself will ultimately come out in the words you use. Self-care is more than an act. It’s a state of mind.
Here are seven phrases used by women that are often misinterpreted and
1) Stop saying “You have the same 24 hours as Beyonce. What’s your excuse?”
No, you don’t. You’re setting yourself up for failure, beloved. Yes, we all have an equal amount of time in the day to accomplish our daily to-do lists, however, celebrities like Beyonce have paid task managers. Her everyday life is navigated with paid help. There is someone working months ahead of time to book her engagements, in addition to day of people who help her effortlessly pull off live events. Unless you can afford a glam squad, a publicist, personal chefs, drivers and glorified gofers, then no, you don’t have the same amount of time as Bey.
Stop catering to the notion that your time should be measured by the number of results produced by others.
Don’t allow social media to rush you into your next impulsive decision.
Bey is today’s symbol of power and feminism, but we are all badasses in our own right. Ignore the world’s timetable of how and when you should accomplish goals. Set goals, prioritize, and put your best foot forward. Every flower blooms in its own season and so will you. Move when you’re ready.
2) Stop saying “Did that make sense?”
I am most guilty of abusing this phrase. Usually, I ask this question if my thought is incomplete or if my words sound unclear, not because my audience appears confused. Your listener will assume you feel as if they didn’t comprehend your statement, and it can be perceived as condescending.
Most importantly, we use this question for validation. Chances are, you weren’t 100% sold on the idea in the first place, instead, you’re seeking reinforcement to solidify your belief. That’s if you believed what you were saying in the first place. If someone has a question about your expertise, let them ask. Don’t give them any reason to doubt you.
3) Stop saying “I heard that ____________”
Did you hear or do you know the information to be true?
Two different things. When you say you “heard” something, it comes off as though you received second-hand information and you’re uncertain of its accuracy. Attribute your information. Otherwise, you’ll be labeled as a troublemaking gossiper. That’s never a good look on you at any age.
4) Stop saying “I don’t know how I feel.”
Traditionally there are six basic human emotions; fear, happiness, sadness, disgust, surprise, and anger. Pick one. This comes two-fold. Nowadays, more individuals are describing their sentiments using the descriptor ‘feels’, that really isn’t a descriptor. “That gave me the feels” or “I have all the feels”. What are feels? And do they come with side effects?
Be direct and clear with your emotions. You are likely sending a mixed message if the only way that you can describe your sentiments is by using a vague word such as ‘feels’ or ‘I’m okay.’ Stop giving people a pass to disregard your feelings because, well, they don’t know how you feel.
Put an end to this noncommunicative, emoji culture that is on the horizon.
5) Stop saying “I’m sorry” as a space filler.
Save your apologies for the times when you really need it. We go more in depth over here on why you need to stop saying sorry so damn much.
6) Stop saying “I feel so fat.”
If you want to talk about positive affirmations for women, we must end this shaming culture.
7) And stop saying “I don’t know” and start figuring it out.
It’s 2017 and there is no excuse as to why you don’t how to do something. With the millions of free webinars and YouTube tutorials, the information to which you seek is out there. While most of our wells aren’t overflowing with knowledge outside of our respective industries or what we’ve been taught in school, that doesn’t give you an excuse to stop learning.
‘I don’t know’ is also similar to number two on this list in regards to its unclear factor. Depending on the context, this phrase can also signal a passive aggressive tone, in which you’re overall avoiding the true answer.
In some cases, you may truly lack knowledge, however you could miss out on an opportunity if you’re extremely dismissive to what you’re unskilled in. When it comes to jobs and volunteering for tasks, show your eagerness. It could be the key to a promotion. Find a way to show your interest.
Substitute: ‘I am not sure, but I’d like to find out more.’
Mind your tongue.
“You are responsible for the energy that you create for yourself, and you’re responsible for the energy that you bring to others.”